Over 50s Lifestyle Self Care Sunday

Self Care Sunday with Sue – Tip #2 – Stop the Comparison

October 27, 2019
Stop the Comparison

This week I found a quote which gave me the idea for this week’s Self Care Sunday with Sue tip which I share in the video below. I’ve written before about Comparison and Appreciating your Self-Worth which you can read here.

Self Care Sunday - Tip #2



Photo by Sarah Dorweiler, Evano Community

I love social media for keeping up to date with my family and friends but this image from Power of Positivity, is a good reminder.  Let’s not get caught up in playing the comparison game but be grateful for what we have.  

Stop the Comparison

Stop the Comparison

Self Care Sunday with Sue – Tip #2 Stop the Comparison

Are you guilty of comparing yourself and life with others? Why not take a moment to reflect on your own strengths and be grateful for the good in your life.

Women Living Well After 50

Living Life Your Way

40 Comments

  • Reply Erica/Erika October 27, 2019 at 11:44

    I agree with you, Sue, on how social media is a great way to stay up to date with family and friends. We have family living on the East Coast and I love seeing updates, especially the children. I often tell friends to “be as kind to yourself as you are to others.” I need to remember this in my own life. I love your words, “compassion and kindness,” Sue? Beautiful words to share. Have a great week. xx

    • Reply Sue Loncaric October 27, 2019 at 14:02

      I love social media for that reason Erica, although my daughter is very particular about posting photos of her sons which I can appreciate. I love you quote about being kind to yourself as you are to others. With your permission I would love to use that in one of my Self Care Sunday with Sue tips. Have a beautiful week, my friend. xx

      • Reply Erica/Erika October 30, 2019 at 06:12

        Hi Sue, Returning to blog post #MLSTL and sharing SM. ? As I mentioned to Leanne, fun and interesting to be part of this party. Thank you for organizing:)

        • Reply Sue Loncaric October 30, 2019 at 07:39

          Thank you lovely! I enjoy having all of my favourite bloggers in the one place each week. WE have built such a caring and supportive community and I’m glad you are part of it. xx

      • Reply Erica/Erika October 30, 2019 at 06:27

        Definitely, Sue.? A patient shared this quote with me about twenty years ago. I was going through a challenging period in my life and I needed to hear this. I actually wrote it down that evening and I refer back to it. This patient has become a good friend of mine and we see each other a few times a year. Thank you for being part of the good in my life, Sue. xx

        • Reply Sue Loncaric October 30, 2019 at 07:37

          You are so lovely Erica and I really appreciate your kind words. Sometimes quotes and people come into our lives at just the right time. I think I need to visit Vancouver Island again so we can catch up. Wouldn’t that be lovely? xx

  • Reply Donna Connolly October 27, 2019 at 12:09

    HI, Sue – I just went onto Facebook purposely to search for your recent tip. When I was finished, I also found it here in my inbox. (I greatly appreciate you putting your tips in both places so I don’t miss them). I agree with other readers who say that key strengths of yours are compassion and kindness. To that, I would also add deep thinking and generosity. 😀

    • Reply Sue Loncaric October 27, 2019 at 14:01

      Thank you Donna! I decided to publish each week as some readers don’t use social media regularly and I thought it was a nice addition to my blog. Have a beautiful week and thank you for your kind words about my strengths. I am so grateful for our friendship. xx

  • Reply Terri Webster Schrandt October 28, 2019 at 06:15

    I believe social media has heightened this idea of comparison and has led to depression and some cases of suicide in young people. I truly believe as we age, we see the value of our lives well lived and feel blessed by the experiences, Sue. A great reminder of how we should live our lives!

    • Reply Sue Loncaric October 30, 2019 at 07:51

      I agree Terri and it is such a shame for young people who find it hard to remember that their lives are just as valid. In saying that I’m don’t compare myself to what others have, but rather I sometimes fall into comparing myself as a person and my talents with others. Have a beautiful week. xx

  • Reply Jo October 28, 2019 at 16:00

    Interestingly I tend not to compare myself to those on social media, but do suffer from comparisonitis from time to time – mainly when I see others doing better than me with their writing lives. Having said that, I’m also aware that people probably compare themselves to me & I’m aware that there’s always going to be someone who seems to have more or have it better. That’s all it usually takes to change my thinking back to where it should be.

    • Reply Sue Loncaric October 30, 2019 at 07:48

      I think we all suffer from comparisonitis at different times Jo, it is only human nature. The recent writing award should reinforce your talent. Have a great week and thanks for stopping by. xx

  • Reply Natalie October 29, 2019 at 09:03

    A very good reminder, Sue. I agree with other readers who say your strengths are compassion and kindness. I’d also add creativity and generosity, You’ve been creative with your regular blog posts and generously share your thoughts with all of us. #lifethisweek

    • Reply Sue Loncaric October 30, 2019 at 07:46

      Thank you Natalie, I have never thought creativity was one of my strengths but writing is being creative isn’t it? I think you are fearless and an adventurer and admire those qualities in you. xx

  • Reply Debbie Harris October 29, 2019 at 21:25

    Hi Sue, another great post and lovely comments as well from everyone. I agree with what you say about comparisons, at the moment I’m too busy to even share my own life let alone compare it with anyone else’s 🙂 Thanks for sharing your insights, you really are an amazing friend to have xx #lifethisweek

    • Reply Sue Loncaric October 30, 2019 at 07:45

      Thank you Deb and I’m enjoying my new theme for Sundays. Thank you for your friendship which is very precious to me. Have a beautiful week my friend. xx

  • Reply Debbie Harris October 30, 2019 at 07:10

    Back again for #mlstl Sue and have shared xx

    • Reply Sue Loncaric October 30, 2019 at 07:36

      Thanks my friend and loved the photo of you and Toni xx

  • Reply Jennifer Jones October 30, 2019 at 08:08

    Great advice Sue. I’m sure it’s easy to caught up in comparison games which would only lead to feeling bad about yourself. #MLSTL Will share

  • Reply Lydia C. Lee October 30, 2019 at 09:35

    Social media is really about how you use it. I use it for discussion and invitiations to do stuff, so people can opt in. I use insta for photos of what I’m doing, but that includes walking the dog or something kooky in the city. I don’t really understand the jealousy thing on SM, but more of my friends use it the way I use it so I guess I see it more as a social activity, rather than broadcasting…But ultimately, life is complicated, and we can really only focus on our own activity and lifting others. There’s little time for anything else. #MLSTL

  • Reply Leanne | www.crestingthehill.com.au October 30, 2019 at 12:07

    Hi Sue – you are looking and sounding fabulous in your video (very well spoken my friend!) My immediate response was to compare myself and how awful I’d be at videoing (so much for listening to your great advice!!) I did pull myself up and recognized what I was doing, so that’s a good sign. I think social media and it’s penchant for showing the highlight reel of everyone else’s life plays a big part in the mental health problems we see today. I use it very carefully and stay well away from Instagram because I don’t need carefully curated photos filling my head!
    It’s #MLSTL party number 90 already – can you believe that???!! And of course I’ve shared this on my SM xxx

  • Reply Suzanne October 30, 2019 at 14:11

    One thing I don’t do is compare myself and our life with others. As a couple with no children, we have a different path to follow even more so now that the Squires time is limited due to cancer. I have always believed if I wanted to do something, I would work towards it. Having said that I wouldn’t mind healthy knees after climbing the Mount 🙂 I didn’t receive my email notification this week. Have a good week.

  • Reply Min @ Write of the Middle October 30, 2019 at 14:18

    The comparison trap is a tricky thing and I agree that social media has made it more prevalent. Social Media generally only shows people’s highlight reels and not the lowlights, however even with this knowledge it can still affect us before we even realise. We can feel less popular, less attractive, less fashionable, less well travelled, less successful and so on. My best quality? I’m really not good as this stuff. I think that I am caring and kind. I hope so. You most certainly are Sue. Enjoy the rest of your week! xo

  • Reply Denyse Whelan October 30, 2019 at 18:31

    I’ve learned over the years not to do this but it can still bite me. I even was feeling something about another head and neck cancer patient and her ease of recovery compared to mine…and then I stopped! We are each different inside and out and each of us brings new and different things to our lives. It can be a downer to compare but being aware is a big step towards greater contentment. Great post Sue.

    Thanks for linking up for #lifethisweek. Next week’s optional prompt is 44/51 Colours I Love 4/11/19 and I hope to see you link up then too. Denyse.

    • Reply Sue Loncaric November 1, 2019 at 08:42

      I think it bites everyone from time to time Denyse and you are right if we are aware that is the key to moving forward. Have a lovely weekend. xx

  • Reply Christina Daggett October 30, 2019 at 19:02

    I agree Sue, with the others that said your strengths are kindness and compassion. I love this time in our lives when we can really take stock and ask ourselves what are our strengths and how can we appreciate ourselves more. As for my strengths, I’ll have to ask my husband who knows me best. He says I’m artistic and bring beauty to the world. That’s one I don’t see. I’m still a little insecure about my art. I do see myself as having a lot of patience, though. Thanks for reminding us not to compare ourselves to others. Sharing this to FB.

    • Reply Sue Loncaric November 1, 2019 at 08:44

      Hi Christina thank you for your lovely words about my strengths. I would think one of yours is adaptability as you have moved countries many times and that isn’t easy. I love your husbands thoughts on your strengths – he is a keeper! xx

  • Reply Candi Randolph October 30, 2019 at 20:17

    Hi Sue, I loved the video and the ‘homework’! It is so easy to look at others, especially on SM, and for me personally, from a business perspective as a blogger, and compare myself in a negative way. Asking us to write down 5 strengths about ourselves sounds simple but in reality, is a challenge. But it takes the focus off of comparison and back on us, in a healthy and positive way. I think that my strengths of encouragement and organization help me as a blogger, and I am trying to use those as I go forward. Thanks for a thought provoking post and video. xo

    • Reply Sue Loncaric November 1, 2019 at 08:46

      Thanks Candi, as you know it isn’t easy putting yourself out there and I need to think more about my appearance. Taking a look at our strengths helps build our self esteem and as you say takes the focus off comparison. Have a great weekend and hope all good in your world. xx

  • Reply Agnes October 31, 2019 at 03:44

    The longer I’m on Social Media the more I stay away from it. There is so much airing of dirty laundry or painting a picture brighter than reality. Great reality check to stop and write down five gifts we have – because we do have at least that many! Sharing in my group for sure!

    • Reply Sue Loncaric November 1, 2019 at 08:47

      Thanks for sharing Agnes and yes I’m in two minds about social media. I do love it to stay in touch with family and friends and of course we can choose what we read and what we scroll past. Have a great weekend. xx

  • Reply Leslie Susan Clingan October 31, 2019 at 06:52

    Wise words. I really think I could give up social media for the most part, except seeing photos of family shared through Instagram and Facebook. Oh, and my book club. Would be hard to do it without social media. It is so easy to get caught up on what this person has, that person wears, and hardest for me, where everyone is traveling.

    • Reply Sue Loncaric November 1, 2019 at 08:49

      Thanks Leslie. I’m like you where social media is concerned. I love the family and friends interaction and of course the ST60 Facebook group but I generally scroll through everything else. It is hard to see others traveling isn’t it? I’m very lucky that I can and your day will come too. xx

  • Reply Theresa Muth October 31, 2019 at 07:04

    Hi Sue
    As always, I carry your words of wisdom with me. I saw this when you posted it on FaceBook and think it’s a great reminder for everyone! I am just so thankful my kids were older and were not brought up in this age of social media which can be so damaging. As a blogger, I’m just trying to be authentic to myself and try hard not to compare myself to anyone. Just do my one thing. Thanks again for the reminder!

    • Reply Sue Loncaric November 1, 2019 at 08:51

      Thank you Theresa. I love that others find my words encouraging or inspiring because that is my objective. I agree with you about social media and I’m glad my children are in their 30s. I do worry for the grandchildren though. Keep doing your own thing and enjoy! xx

  • Reply Nancy Andres October 31, 2019 at 23:45

    Hi Sue, What a good reminder for self-care Sunday. I measure the progress I’ve made by looking back in time to my behavior, attitudes, and lifestyle as it was many years ago. That way, I’m able to see all the progress, growth, and learnings I’ve gone through over the years. Thanks for hosting #MLSTL and being a power of example for so many women. Shared on SM. Have a lovely day.

    • Reply Sue Loncaric November 1, 2019 at 09:04

      Thank you for your lovely words, Nancy and it is always a pleasure having you join us at #MLSTL. xx

  • Reply Pamela November 1, 2019 at 22:08

    Good reminder(s) of what’s really important in our lives – and not comparing ourselves to the lives of others. FB is wonderful for me to connect with old (er, long-time) high school and college friends, family who don’t live nearby, and other writers from across the world. And I like sharing from time to time “stuff” that I’m doing, whether hiking in a lovely place with a grandchild/my guy or publishing a new book. But. I’m careful to not over post and definitely to not post on vacations and get-aways. I have friends who share photo after photo of their times in Italy and Paris and Iceland and …. and I think, that’s tough on so many who can’t get out of their neighborhood because they’re working hard to keep on keeping on.

    • Reply Sue Loncaric November 2, 2019 at 18:02

      Hi Pamela lovely of you to stop by and leave a comment. I enjoy FB to stay connected with family and friends and I love my FB Group and fellow bloggers. I hadn’t actually thought about posting travels. I do because family ask me to share with them but I hadn’t given thought to how others might feel whilst I’m having a good time. Thanks for the making that point. Have a lovely weekend and I hope you visit again. x

  • Reply Miriam November 7, 2019 at 07:04

    A wonderful reminder Sue. And yes, you most definitely do show kindness and compassion. Your blog and all you share here is a gift to others. Happy Thursday! xx

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