Well Valentine’s Day is nearly upon us and the usual cards, flowers and gifts will keep retailers happy! But do we need a reason to celebrate our love?
I always thought that Valentine’s Day was actually a bit of a ‘gimmick’ and it shouldn’t just be one day a year that we show our loved one how much we care.
However, after hearing a conversation on the radio station, I’m thinking that perhaps we do!
I was listening to the radio yesterday and a woman had actually emailed to the Radio Station her thoughts about how she felt her husband regarded their relationship. I’m not actually one to be public about my relationship, however she felt she needed to do this. The Radio Station then phoned the husband and read him the contents of the email.
His response was that he was guilty of ‘not putting enough effort in’.
For those of us in long-term relationships it is easy to fall into a comfortable pattern and not really ‘try anymore’. We have all heard about ‘mid-life’ crisis and these days I think women are experiencing this more than men!
If you ask older people who have been married for a long time, what is their one piece of advice they would give for a happy longterm relationship, they usually say that keeping open communication should be a priority.
It is so easy to be with each other and not even talk after a while.
Now, of course this is something that you welcome occasionally – that lovely feeling of just being together and not having to say anything. However, communication is so important to keeping the relationship alive.
Any relationship is not perfect, and it needs nurturing to keep it alive.You feed and water your plants so why not 'tend' to your relationship?Click To Tweet
Being 50+ doesn’t mean that romance goes out the door. It is wonderful to experience romance in our lives and feel special about our relationship. However, Romance doesn’t happen you need to make it happen.Romance doesn't just happen in a relationship. You have to make it happen.Click To Tweet
4 ways to bring the ‘spark’ back to your relationship
Reflect on how it was when you first fell in love and why you fell in love with your partner. Yes, I know that the giddy feeling of the first stage of love doesn’t last forever – but why does it have to die completely?
Reflect on times you have shared together which were special to you both and talk about those times. My husband and I have been lucky to travel the world and sharing those memories brings us closer when we reminisce.
Communicate how you feel and be honest with each other. This includes discussing your sex life. As we get older it doesn’t mean that we can’t experience the physical side of a loving relationship.
Turn the TV off, light some candles, put on some soft music, set a ‘romantic’ table, dress to impress and enjoy a meal together without any distractions. When was the last time you actually had a conversation over dinner?
Tell each other you love them. We take for granted that our partner knows this, but how lovely it is to hear ‘I love you’ especially if it is not expected.
Surprise each other! When was the last time you left a love note? When my husband worked and travelled, I would always leave a couple of little notes in his suitcase to find when he was away.
Make some Plans
Remember how excited you were when you first were together and all the dreams and plans you had for the future? Recapture that feeling by making some plans for a holiday or something you want to do together. Get excited again!
Perhaps as I said in my opening paragraph, we do need a day to examine our relationship and remind us of how much we love our partner and perhaps Feb 14 St Valentine’s day is a good place to start.
What can you do to bring the spark back?
Don’t leave it to your partner to make things happen. Make the first move, it is an equal partnership after all.
Let’s Keep Sizzling!