Over 50s Lifestyle

Filling a bucket each day with Kindness

June 14, 2020
Kindness

Children’s books and spending time with children can remind us of the simplest things in life. My daughter has been reading to her sons since they were born and both now have a love of books even at the young ages of 6 and 2. She includes books that are fun to read, educational books and one in particular that I love is ‘Have you Filled a Bucket Today? A Guide to Daily Happiness for Kids’ by Carol McLoud. Perhaps you have heard of it or read it with your children or grandchildren?

As adults we get caught up in the stresses of life and forget the basic principles that help us to find happiness and contentment in life. The principles that make us caring and considerate of not only others but ourselves.

In the Women Living Well After 50 Facebook Group, I’ve started a ‘weekly focus’. Recent topics have included Finding Silence and Stillness each day and this week we have put the focus on the Value of a Smile. This coming week the focus will be on Kindness to others and ourselves. Sometimes I feel that words can be overused and lose impact but now when there is so much pain in the world is the perfect time to focus on the simple act of being kind to others.

Filling a bucket each day

In the book , Have you Filled your Bucket today?, the author, Carol McCloud uses a metaphor of filling a bucket and dipper, to illustrate that when we choose to be kind, we not only fill the buckets of those around us, but also fill our OWN bucket!  Conversely, when we are unkind to others we are dipping into their buckets and taking happiness away.

Such a simple metaphor but one I know my grandson remembered. He often does something for me and explains that he is ‘filling your bucket with happiness, Nan.’

The story reminds us that showing kindness and appreciation helps to make the world a happier place, which we all know is not the case at the moment. Being kind has many health benefits for the giver and the receiver.

Filling a bucket each day

The Benefits of Showing Kindness

  • You make someone feel special and loved
  • You will feel happier and more fulfilled being kind to others
  • The reward of a smile and knowing you have made someone feel good makes you feel good
  • Kindness is contagious
  • It builds relationships – we are nicer people to be around
  • Improves your mental well-being
  • We feel more compassion
  • You will feel more positive and enjoy life
  • It makes us appreciate and be grateful for all we have
  • We learn tolerance

We can be a role model to our children and grandchildren who learn from us. Our own actions influence their behaviour and showing kindness may just help world be a nicer place to live in. 

Random acts of kindness don’t have to be big

I remember paying for a cup of coffee for the next person at a Coffee Shop. For the price of a coffee I felt excitement and joy at doing something for a complete stranger.

Asking a friend ‘if they are okay?’ I hadn’t seen a friend on Facebook over the last week and this was unusal. I gave her a quick call to see if she was okay and she was so appreciative of my call.

It is the little things that matter.

Becoming your own best friend

Kindness
The best friend you will ever find is you.

Why is it that we find it easy to show kindness and love to others but feel guilty about showing that same respect to ourselves? We need to friends with ourself.

Being kind to others is so important but we also need to be kind to ourselves.

Life gets busy or because of limiting beliefs we forget that we need show ourselves some kindness. Self-care and self-love are important areas to truly become a Woman Living Well. We need to become friends with ourselves and treat ourselves the way we treat our best friend – with respect and love.

Making time to  Nurture yourself and you will be a better person for not only for yourself but for others.

Will you join me this week to focus on Kindness to yourself and others? Will you make filling a bucket a daily priority?

blossom-8120_1920
Elderberry is the flower of Kindness

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48 Comments

  • Reply Toni Pike June 14, 2020 at 12:04

    Amazing article, Sue. I so agree with you that nothing is more important than loving yourself – and from that everything else will flow. With you, my friend, there is so much to love. Toni x

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 14, 2020 at 15:46

      Oh thank you Toni, you have certainly filled my bucket with your comment. Have a lovely week, my friend. x

  • Reply Leslie Susan Clingan June 14, 2020 at 12:13

    Fun to be reminded of this book. I bought it for my school and have a copy here at home, I think. Love the message. It has been hard to fill my bucket with kindness during these stay-at-home days but hope to get back to doing random acts of kindness now that the world is reopening.

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 14, 2020 at 15:45

      I think adults should read this book as well Leslie as we can always be reminded that being kind and generous is important in life. xx

  • Reply Christine June 14, 2020 at 13:34

    What a beautiful post Sue! It really touched my heart. Your point about taking the time to be kind to ourselves is so very important. One of my favourite quotes is that we can’t pour from an empty cup, in this case we can’t fill from an empty bucket of kindness. Sometimes it is the simplest acts of kindness that make such a difference to someone’s day. And I know from experience that you certainly live out this message! Xx
    I haven’t heard of that book, but will be buying it for my grandchildren as it is such an important message for them.

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 14, 2020 at 15:44

      Thank you Chris. Your grandchildren will enjoy this book and it is a beautiful way to teach them to be kind and generous. x

  • Reply Bev June 14, 2020 at 13:59

    Kindness is so needed now. I used this book and others by them in my class and the children really did get the idea of filling a bucket with good deeds and kindness.
    Great post!
    The author of Wonder, R.J. Palacio has a whole website devoted to her “Choose Kind” campaign.

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 14, 2020 at 15:42

      Hi Bev! It is such a lovely way to explain to children the idea of being kind and generous. My daughter revisits it regularly and I’m sure she will be reading to her younger son as well. Thanks for the website I will check it out. Enjoy your week and thanks for visiting.x

  • Reply Joanne Tracey June 14, 2020 at 14:09

    Gorgeous post & I love the imagery of the bucket. I’m wishing that I had someone small I could buy the book for!

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 14, 2020 at 15:40

      I love this book Jo and adults should have a copy too! Have a lovely week. 🙂

  • Reply Debbie Harris June 14, 2020 at 21:18

    I’ve not heard of that book Sue, but I’ll definitely keep an eye out for it now! I also agree that kindness doesn’t have to be big acts they can be small and caring. I appreciate your reminder of being kind to ourselves too!

    • Reply Debbie Harris June 18, 2020 at 20:31

      Hi Sue, back for #mlstl (a bit late sorry) and am sharing! Thanks for all you do 🙂

      • Reply Sue Loncaric June 20, 2020 at 09:48

        Thank you Deb, I always appreciate your support. x

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 20, 2020 at 10:04

      Hi Deb, I think your grandchildren would love this book so perhaps you can add a copy to their Christmas stockings. xx

  • Reply Donna Connolly June 15, 2020 at 05:20

    This past week, I attended a university webinar on what we are not talking about regarding Covid. The short summary was that most of us are not revealing our best selves right now. There are a million valid reasons why. The simple conclusion? Extending kindness to others — even when their behaviors are far less than exemplary. Kindness – it costs so little and makes a remarkable difference!

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 20, 2020 at 10:05

      I love that you keep learning Donna and I agree that kindness costs nothing really in the scheme of things but it can bring so much joy to others. xx

  • Reply Lydia C. Lee June 15, 2020 at 07:30

    What a lovely post. I do think it’s interesting that we forget ourselves when thinking about being kind. #Lifethisweek

    • Reply Lydia C. Lee June 17, 2020 at 09:21

      And shared for #MLSTL

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 20, 2020 at 09:59

      Thank you Lydia. We do forget to be kind to ourselves, don’t we? I’m trying to do this more often but accept there will be times when I am too hard on myself. x

  • Reply Natalie June 15, 2020 at 10:11

    Hi Sue, A beautiful message and so relevant to current challenging times. Thank you for sharing this. I said thank you to a gardener today and told him I appreciate his work efforts to maintain such a beautiful public garden. I could tell that he didn’t expect it and was moved by what I said. He thanked me back and said he appreciated me letting him know. A simple and sincere act that made both of us feel good. Have a wonderful week! #lifethisweek

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 20, 2020 at 10:00

      Hi Natalie, I’m sure you brightened the gardener’s day with your words. People just like to be acknowledged and appreciated don’t they? It doesn’t take much of an effort to make others feel good. Enjoy your weekend.xx

  • Reply Leanne | www.crestingthehill.com.au June 15, 2020 at 11:40

    Hi Sue – I’ve bookmarked that children’s book because I think it would be a really good one for the grandgirls for Christmas. I’m a big fan of kindness (the world needs it badly) but I’m not so great at being kind or loving to myself – it feels selfish or self-centred to me and I think that’s a product of my generation and my upbringing. I’m definitely working at the idea of being kinder to “me” and giving myself some grace (maybe that will turn into love?) Looking forward to your week of kindness in the WLW group.

    • Reply Leanne | www.crestingthehill.com.au June 17, 2020 at 14:14

      Hi Sue – just back for MLSTL and to let you know that I’ve shared this on my SM xxx

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 20, 2020 at 10:01

      Your grandgirls would love it Leanne and it will be extra special because you have given it to them. Being kinder to ourselves just doesn’t come easy as we have discussed in the past but I think the message is getting out there. We just have to be more mindful of being friends with ourselves.

  • Reply Christina Henry June 15, 2020 at 16:18

    Hi Sue, What a lovely book for children that is. And how lovely that your grandson has already learned the gift of kindness from the book. A little bit of kindness goes a long way, regards Christina

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 20, 2020 at 10:02

      A little kindness does go a long way Christina and I would recommend this book to adults and children. It has such a great message. x

  • Reply Veronica @ The Burgeoning Bookshelf June 15, 2020 at 17:49

    Such a lovely post Sue and your message of kindness to yourself is one we must keep being reminded of. All too often we neglect ourselves to concentrate solely on others. I must look up the book you mentioned. It would be a good read for my grandchildren.

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 20, 2020 at 10:03

      Thank you Veronica and yes we do neglect ourselves at times. Your grandchildren will love the book and I think you will too. x

  • Reply Vanessa June 15, 2020 at 19:58

    I find it so hard to know sometimes if a friend isn’t sharing on social media or if social media just isn’t showing me their posts.

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 20, 2020 at 10:06

      I know Vanessa. I think that social media isn’t always reliable. Do you mean on your blog or social media in general?

  • Reply Laurie June 16, 2020 at 03:46

    I have never heard of the book but now I want to get it to read to my grandsons! I love the idea of filling others’ buckets. Kindness is a bucket-filler for sure. It often takes so little effort on our part to be kind and the rewards are great. Good reminder to be kind to ourselves too. Sometimes it’s easier to remember to be kind to others than to ourselves.

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 20, 2020 at 09:58

      I think you grandsons would love it and so would you Laurie. It has a great message and one that the children remember.I know it made an impact on my grandson. x

  • Reply Erica/Erika June 16, 2020 at 12:02

    I have not heard of Carol McLoud’s book. The concept of “kindness” is surfacing recently. Possibly because it is greatly needed always and especially today. The metaphor of filling the bucket is wonderful. I had not thought about how it also fills OUR bucket. I like all of the benefits you have outlined. “Contagious” is interesting. I may have mentioned to you a long time ago how a friend (an acquaintance at the time) sent me a note saying “be as kind to yourself as you are to others.” I still carry this note with me as a reminder during challenging times. A great post, Suei

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 20, 2020 at 09:57

      Hi Erica I think your grandchildren would love this book and I enjoy reading it as well. Your friend certainly gave you wise words,although at times we are so busy being kind to others and doing for others that we forget to be kind to ourselves. Take care and enjoy your weekend. xx

  • Reply Denyse Whelan June 16, 2020 at 18:45

    Such a lovely and heart-warming post Sue. Your daughter’s example with her sons is so encouraging them, at a young age, to be kind and caring. I have a couple of ‘instructions for my day’ on my phone and one is ‘be kind’. I am usually very kind to others…not so much to me but I am getting better. Far less self-criticism and far more treating myself as I would a friend.

    Thank you for linking up for Life This Week. I have created a list of lovely regular linkers such as you on the right hand side of my blog. It’s now showing more of the community that gathers here each Monday to share our stories. Great to see you here too. Next week’s optional prompt is to ‘share your snaps’….hope you will be back. Denyse.

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 20, 2020 at 09:56

      I’m very proud of my daughter and SIL for their parenting approach. The boys are surrounded by love but also Rachel loves to teach them to be well adjusted little humans who are kind and caring. The teacher commented to her last year that Ethan was such a beautiful soul who was always caring of others. xx

  • Reply Michele Somerville June 17, 2020 at 05:18

    Thank you for this post. It is a great example especially in the midst of ongoing tension here in the states and other places. Social Media is getting nasty, like people are yelling at each other in meme like posts. Nothing stimulates conversation or healing or forgiveness, just more resentment. Can you tell that I am feeling the stress and anxiety? This book could be very timely. I am tempted to buy it! Thank you, Thank you.

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 20, 2020 at 09:54

      Do buy it, Michele as I believe it is inspiring for adults as well as children. Sending best wishes and hope you are feeling more relaxed soon. xx

  • Reply Nancy Andres June 17, 2020 at 08:56

    Just love this essay Sue, especially since kindness is my word for 2020. Glad this is my focus, because I think coping with the many changes since the start of COVID-19 virus is challenging for us all. So happy I read this today. Your post warmed my heart. Will share on SM. Be well. Stay safe, and lead a colorful life.

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 20, 2020 at 09:52

      Thank you for your lovely words Nancy and I’m glad that my post ‘warmed your heart’. The book is just beautiful and should be read by everyone,not just children. x

  • Reply Christine Field June 17, 2020 at 10:20

    Just this past week, the person ahead of me at Starbucks paid for my coffee. Then, while I was struggling with an unruly package at the post office, a stranger offered me their roll of tape – he even went out to his car to grab it. I don’t remember many significant happenings this week, but these two acts of kindness are etched on my heart as I purpose to pass kindness on!

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 20, 2020 at 09:51

      Isn’t it just lovely when random acts of kindness happen, Christine? I’m sure you will remember these two acts and also I think it reminds us that there are still good people out in the world. xx

  • Reply Christina Daggett June 18, 2020 at 00:13

    Thank you, Sue for inspiring us all to be kind! I’d love to send this book to my daughter. I think she would enjoy reading it to her new baby girl.

    • Reply Sue Loncaric June 20, 2020 at 09:49

      Hi Christina, it is a beautiful book so yes, buy it for your grandaughter. There are several books available now. xx

  • Reply Corinne Rodrigues July 2, 2020 at 17:07

    The last two weeks I’ve been busy with puppy rescues and it gives so much joy. I have to remember to be kind to myself too. Thanks for the reminder, Sue.

    • Reply Sue Loncaric July 3, 2020 at 13:09

      I can imagine how joyful those puppies are Corinne and knowing you are rescuing them makes it all the more special. x

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