Ageing Well Ageing Well, Living Well Over 50s Lifestyle

Ageing Well – What do you do when you lose the magic?

February 23, 2020
How to Keep the Magic in Our Lives

Part of Ageing Well and Living Well is feeling that little zest for life. The ‘magic’ that keeps life fun and interesting. Life isn’t like that all the time, so how do we rediscover the magic? My next guest in the Ageing Well, Living Well series, is Candi Randolph from Inspire My Style.

I’ve known Candi for quite some time now and we have much in common. We both know the importance of keeping healthy, fit and making time for ‘self-care’. Candi shares her thoughts on how to recapture the magic when life takes over.

Sometimes our day-to-day lives feel anything but “magic”.

Life tends to do that, you know, bringing unexpected and sometimes unwanted complications and events that can shake us to our core. Or, just the everyday life happenings that throw us off our game, our routine, our preferred way to spend the day…and we lose the magic.

It can happen as we get older, too. You know, the excitement, anticipation, quest for the unknown, desire to be the best, learn and achieve, and become our best selves. All of those goals and dreams can become faded hopes of the past if we let them.

I’ve found that some women in their 50’s, 60’s and beyond feel like they’ve done it. They know what they need to know, their life is what it is, and they just keep treading water every day, getting older, frumpy and well, kind of crabby. Know anyone like that?

I woke up recently and didn’t feel the magic. Not necessarily old and frumpy, but a little defeated and uncertain.

My life is not the typical mid 60’s life. I am single (widowed if you want the specifics) work because I need to, although I love what I do and always want to continue growing and developing as a person. Retirement is a long range goal, and even though I am not nearly ready to sit back and enjoy the days at a leisurely pace, I know that it’s up to me to keep my life moving forward, financially and otherwise.

So the magic had taken a little vacation and I had a short pity party. But it’s over now, thank you very much. I was not willing to let the magic leave me for long.

How to Keep the Magic in Our Lives

How to Keep the Magic in Our Lives

I have learned that it’s up to me to keep that magic in my life by putting one foot in front of the other and maintaining a healthy balance with myself and my activities.

And it starts in my little head. That’s where I, and I think many of us, can let ourselves spiral downward, even if it’s just for a few minutes, and start feeling all of those feelings that can hurt us emotionally and otherwise, and stop us in our tracks.

Well, my feet (and my little head) are going to keep moving forward, as is my life, and my healthy lifestyle.

This is what I do to keep the ‘magic’ in my life.

A healthy morning routine does so much for me

How about you? Do you start the day with purpose? With a simple morning routine that includes activities and actions that say, “I care about myself today”?

It’s such a simple thing, but those few first-thing-in-the-morning activities can help get my focus where it needs to be. My mind, body and inner self need to be on the same page, or I’m not going to stay focused and do what I want to, and need to do.

Know when it’s time to work, and when it’s time to stop and relax. Maintain the balance.

I have a habit of working, quite a bit. Although I love my work I can forget to take time away from “the job”, so am trying to pay attention to my body and mind when it is telling me to stop.

Recently I decided to get involved in the church I attended for many years before moving out of state. I love to sing, so returning to the choir would give me the opportunity to do that, worship regularly, and interact with people in a social setting.

Although I could just stay home and occupy my time by myself, it’s not maintaining the balance in my life. So off I go every Wednesday evening and at least 2 Sundays per month. And it’s good. I like it.

Be grateful for what I have…every single day

Okay, this might be a little bit TMI, but it is a practical application of the words that can flow so freely without much thought, “I’m grateful for what I have every day”.

I was dutifully providing some much needed foot care for myself the other day…trimming, polishing, moisturizing…and as I looked at my feet I thought how unattractive they were becoming as I age. My little toes are turning outward, the toenails are not exactly what you would call attractive, and overall they just look, well, old.

And then I thought about a friend who is not able to move her legs or feet, but sits in a wheel chair every day of her life.

And a blogger I know of who lost her arms and legs to a horrible virus.

And then I was ashamed for thinking that my feet were ugly. I have two of them and they get me where I want to go. I am grateful for those feet, and for every day that they work for me.

I truly am grateful for what I have, every day, and keeping that focus helps me hold onto the magic.

Plan for the future; don’t obsess over it

I am a planner by nature, usually with a Plan A and a Plan B for the more significant decisions I make in my life.

And while planning ahead is a good thing overall, it can also become a stone around our neck, taking the magic away from our days if we let The Plan become our reason for existing.

So although I always have a plan for the day, for the week, month, and the significant decisions and directions, I try to keep these things in perspective and enjoy each day.

Which brings me to the final thought.

Remember that every day is a gift

I am not going to waste one minute of it feeling down, depressed, or sorry for myself. Just listen to the news for a few minutes and you’ll learn more than you want to know about the ills of the world, unexpected happenings, calamities outside of our control, and famous people who appeared to ‘have it all’, and suddenly they’re gone.

I have today. That’s what I have been given. And when I remember that and am truly grateful for the opportunity, that ol’ magic sticks around. And I like it that way.

Meet Candi

How to Keep the Magic in our Lives

Candi Randolph is a woman in midlife who writes about the experiences that women have as they go through this unique phase of their life, with topics like natural aging, healthy eating, fitness, casual fashion, home, and family. She lives daily by faith and a strong cup of coffee.

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39 Comments

  • Reply Candi Randolph February 23, 2020 at 04:35

    Hi Sue, thank you so much for having me as a guest on your blog. It is truly an honor. I’ve shared it on SM. xo

  • Reply Jo February 23, 2020 at 07:10

    Great post! I believe that no one can give us the magic, that it has to come from within and all of the tips you’ve included here help with that. I’d like to add another: follow your curiosity…
    Thanks again Sue – and Candy – for keeping us inspired.

    • Reply Candi Randolph February 23, 2020 at 20:36

      Hi Jo, that’s a wonderful addition to the list! Thanks for your thoughts.

  • Reply Toni Pike February 23, 2020 at 08:03

    Such an inspiring article, Candi. I’m also a planner, and sometimes find that can really take over. For various reasons, I can’t plan too far ahead at the moment, but instead am being forced to take one step at a time. I’m learning to appreciate each day as it comes. Toni x

    • Reply Candi Randolph February 23, 2020 at 20:40

      Hi Toni, it can be hard to do, but when you can sincerely be grateful and appreciate the moment and day you’re in, it’s like a breath of fresh air. Thanks for having a read!

  • Reply Debbie Harris February 23, 2020 at 09:26

    Thanks Sue and Candi for this reminder. I sometimes have to remind myself of what I have instead of seeing only the negatives of a situation. I appreciate your thoughts and Sue’s series.

    • Reply Candi Randolph February 23, 2020 at 20:46

      Thank you, Deb, I know what you mean. Our thoughts are so powerful, aren’t they? Thanks so much for your comments.

  • Reply Leslie Susan Clingan February 23, 2020 at 12:49

    Wise words. I have tried to use my gratitude journal for a place to ponder my blessings. On the days when i don’t feel like going to the grocery store, I think back on the days years ago when I had to add up every single thing I put in the grocery cart in order to keep from over-spending. I am grateful that I no longer have that worry. I appreciate your thoughts, Candi, about your original thoughts during your pedicure and the way you changed your perspective.

    I am an old teacher. When dealing with discipline issues, I was taught to phrase things in a positive way. Instead of saying “DON’T RUN!” to my students, we were instructed to say, “Please walk.” Kind of the glass half empty-half full deal. Or just changing perspective.

    • Reply Candi Randolph February 23, 2020 at 20:49

      Hi Leslie, I love the idea of recording in a journal and although I’m not to the point where it happens regularly, it’s a goal of mine to be more faithful to it. It really does make a difference when we can see our thoughts in writing and ponder over them.

  • Reply Leanne | www.crestingthehill.com.au February 23, 2020 at 18:13

    Hi Candi – lovely to see you over here sharing your positivity on Sue’s lovely blog. I really enjoyed reading all your points and I think gratitude and connection are both a big part of keeping the magic in our lives. As you know, I’m finding retirement to be much more to my liking than I expected, but I’m also very mindful about keeping up some social interaction (through church, volunteering, coffee dates with friends etc) to balance out the alone time that I’m enjoying so much.

  • Reply Candi Randolph February 23, 2020 at 20:51

    Hi Leanne, yes, I am always honored to be a guest for Sue! I think you’re wise in maintaining those connections and finding the balance in your life. I’m glad it has worked out so well for you and can feel the contentment in your writing. 🙂

  • Reply Debbie-Dabble February 23, 2020 at 22:40

    Sue and Candi,
    Thanks so much for this article…I am newly retired and adjusting to my new lifestyle which i do LOVE!! I hope you both are enjoying your weekend!!
    Hugs,
    Debbie

    • Reply Candi Randolph February 24, 2020 at 08:26

      Hi Debbie, I’m glad you’re enjoying the retired lifestyle! Thanks for taking the time to read my post. 🙂

  • Reply Savoring Sixty February 24, 2020 at 00:10

    Excellent post! Great reminders as we age. I retire on June 1st and this article with be very helpful as I adjust to my new normal!

    • Reply Candi Randolph February 24, 2020 at 08:27

      Hi, I have found these actions to be very helpful, and I hope you will, too. Thanks!

  • Reply Ingrid February 24, 2020 at 08:09

    These are great timely tips and have given me points to think and act upon.

    • Reply Candi Randolph February 24, 2020 at 08:28

      Hi Ingrid, thanks so much for reading my post, and I hope you find them helpful. Have a great day!

  • Reply Katherine February 24, 2020 at 09:39

    That section on a healthy morning routine really resonated with me. I used to have one, but it has slipped by the wayside and I’m suffering for it. I got a stern talking to from my GP last week, telling me to stop making excuses and fit in some exercise.

    • Reply Candi Randolph February 25, 2020 at 21:38

      Hi Katherine, yes…making sure that exercise is a part of your morning routine, or some part of your day is so important. Give it a try. It’s amazing how much better you’ll feel once you get into the habit of regular exercise.

  • Reply Sydney Shop Girl February 24, 2020 at 11:03

    Candi

    Thank you for sharing about your life with Sue today. I too love a morning routine. I’m also making steps to balance my life as best I can, one area at a time. My current project is being more mindful about screen time. I have cut my daily hours (!!) down and have discovered hobbies and a better connection with loved ones because of it.

    SSG xxx

    • Reply Candi Randolph February 25, 2020 at 21:39

      Hi, it sounds like you’ve got your life on a healthy path, and I love your discoveries!

  • Reply Lydia C. Lee February 24, 2020 at 13:38

    Good advice. it’s always important to have something for you, no matter how small, in each day- exercise, writing, nice conditioner – whatever

    • Reply Candi Randolph February 24, 2020 at 21:48

      Hi Lydia, I agree. We need to be consistent with our self care, even the small stuff!

  • Reply Jody at Six Little Hearts February 24, 2020 at 16:07

    Great advice. Later this year I turn 50 – hard to believe considering I am still raising 6 kids – the youngest just 7. To be honest , I am looking forward to leaving my 40’s as I hear that the 50’s are happier times. Fingers crossed.

    • Reply Candi Randolph February 26, 2020 at 21:27

      Hi Jody, you’ve got your hands full for sure! I hope the next decade is a wonderful time in your life.

  • Reply Vanessa February 24, 2020 at 16:41

    I’ve long been curious if some part of the magic in our lives gets socalised out of us. One day as a child you can play with dolls or toys for hours, and the next they’re just plastic and that magic has gone.

    • Reply Candi Randolph February 24, 2020 at 21:50

      Interesting point, Vanessa, and you may be right about that childhood magic. It seems to be born within us and slowly drains away. I think as we mature the ‘magic’ may have a different definition, but we still need it in our lives.

  • Reply Jennifer Jones February 24, 2020 at 19:40

    Candi, I tend to agree with most of what you say and do in this post. If the pity party turns up in my life , it’s usually when I’m not living my core values. Making sure I have a morning routine that I enjoy helps. For me it’s get out of bed and into the gym early. That usually sparks me up. There is always somebody who is much worse so it’s good to think about what I’m grateful for. I enjoyed this guest post Sue.

    • Reply Candi Randolph February 24, 2020 at 21:52

      Hi Jennifer, my morning routine helps clear my head for the day and stay consistent, and it sounds like yours does something similar for you. Thanks so much for your thoughts!

  • Reply Natalie February 25, 2020 at 00:24

    Thanks, Candi, for sharing your very good tips. Stepping outside our comfort zone and be willing to try something new once in a while also help keep our magic. I appreciate your thoughts and Sue’s series. #lifethisweek

    • Reply Candi Randolph February 25, 2020 at 21:41

      Hi Natalie, thanks for the added suggestion. I am with you on trying new things and remaining curious about life. That will help keep the magic as well as expand our horizons. 🙂

  • Reply Laurie February 25, 2020 at 03:38

    Thanks, Candi for the wonderful encouragement. My zest for life has been sputtering a little bit lately. I needed the reminder to cultivate a grateful attitude. My gratitude level needs a little adjustment! 🙂

    • Reply Candi Randolph February 25, 2020 at 21:42

      Hi Laurie, I’m glad you stopped by for a read, then. We all need gentle reminders sometimes, and I’m no exception to that. Have a great day!

  • Reply Donna Connolly February 26, 2020 at 10:38

    Hi, Candi – I love your positive attitude. I agree with your core philosophy that “it is up to each of us to keep the magic in our lives”. There are so many different things that life throws at us, especially as we age. So many of them we simply can’t control. But we can control and adjust our attitudes. Great, inspiring post! #MLSTL

    • Reply Candi Randolph February 26, 2020 at 21:28

      You’re right, Donna, we can always control our attitude and approach toward life. Thanks so much for having a read!

  • Reply Denyse Whelan February 28, 2020 at 09:38

    Candi that was refreshing and insightful to read. I was/am a planner but I loosely plan these days as rigid rules (mine) were not helping me enjoy more of the moments of life. I am now 70 and the past few months post birthday I have reflected on the ‘what now’ a bit and realise, it’s the same as each and every day. Be grateful for what I have and can do, connect with people outside the home each day and enjoy spaces that I can fill as I choose.
    Thank you Sue for sharing Candi’s words. Very good ones for sure.

    Thank you for linking up for Life This Week. Next week’s optional prompt is Taking Stock. Using words of your own or ones from other bloggers as prompts is cool. Hope to see you there: 2 March 2020. Denyse.

  • Reply Candi Randolph February 28, 2020 at 20:46

    Hi Denyse, I love your daily thoughts of gratitude – it just about covers it all. 🙂

  • Reply Christina Henry March 1, 2020 at 12:07

    You have such a positive outlook on life which is inspiring. I see people who are dealing with the most serious health issues in my job as a Registered Nurse in a large hospital. It makes you realise how lucky we are to be alive – we might have a few health complaints but there’s always someone way worse off than you. Envy and jealousy of other people is an extremely negative trait – instead we should focus on being grateful for what we have, not what we don’t have. Thank you for your inspiring words – they’ve reminded me of what is really important in life

    • Reply Candi Randolph March 1, 2020 at 21:44

      Hi Christina, I’m sure you see so much heartache and pain in your job. I admire you for having the compassion and skill to help others in a medical setting. And you’re right about focusing on what we have; it’s so easy to feel sorry for ourselves or jealous of others who seem to have more than we do. Having more stuff isn’t what makes us happy or fulfilled.

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