Over 50s Lifestyle

My Midlife Journey – Be Courageous

July 5, 2016
My Midlife Journey

Guest writer #4 in my Midlife Matters Series is Karen from One Salty Kiss I first met Karen through a blogging group called Have Your Cupcake and immediately loved her approach to midlife.  A love of being active is something we share, although Karen can be seen daily on a surfboard where as I’m usually on solid ground running.

I was curious about the name of Karen’s Blog – One Salty Kiss and you can click on this link to read about how and why she came up with the name for her blog.  What’s a Salty Kiss Made Of?

You can read more about Karen below and also where you can find and follow her on social media.

In her post, Karen will share her insights and thoughts on midlife and as she says “I’d prefer to tackle age, and my life, with determination, chutzpah, and with fire.”

midlife woman

 

Karen writes……

Midlife for me has been an intoxicating ride. I have gained the wisdom from having learned some of life’s lessons. I have come to understand how truly short life is. And I have uncovered a bold new attitude.

As a young woman, I did what I was “supposed to.” I went to college, got a good job, married a good guy and had two kids. I did what was expected. I never veered too far left of center.

When my second child was born, I quit my job and became a stay at home mom. I loved my role as mom and made sure whatever I did, my kids and family were foremost in my mind.

When my kids became teenagers and I was entering my 40s, I panicked a little because my role of mom started changing. My identity was shifting as my kids became more independent and needed me less. If I wasn’t a busy mom, what was I?

This “crisis” was a blessing in disguise because I started to realize, I didn’t have to confine myself to the role of wife and mom, I could reinvent myself to be whatever I chose.

I also decided that I was finished living by other people’s rules; by what I thought others expected. I was determined to start living by my rules. This meant dusting off my passions and dreams. It meant devoting time to things I love and not worrying so much about what anyone else thought.

As I was dedicating more time to me and discovering new passions, I began to open myself up to unfamiliar opportunities and adventures. I vowed to say YES to everything that came my way. I made a conscious decision to squeeze every drop of fun from this life. I took dance classes, pottery classes, traveled, went to concerts, stretched myself physically and professionally. Any new opportunity that came my way I said, “yes!”

I started surfing. I started blogging. I started writing. I started speaking. And now I am starting my own business. Entering midlife helped me gain the confidence to get out of my box, try new things, and experience all life has to offer.

There is a sense of freedom that comes from being a “middle age” woman. Click To Tweet

When I entered my 40s, I developed a level of confidence, self-assuredness and a “go for it” attitude that I hadn’t had earlier in life.

 

I am chasing my dreams and embracing life with both arms stretched wide open.Click To Tweet

 karen

Society isn’t always kind to women over 40. It’s constantly telling us what is acceptable for women “our age”; what to do to look younger and what we are or aren’t supposed to wear. Well this is bullsh*t. I refuse to let society tell me, that since I am not in my 20s, I can or cannot do certain things.

As a surfer and beach lover, I will wear a bikini and flip flops until I am no longer breathing. I’m pretty sure both of those are somewhere on a, “List of What Not to Wear for Women Over 40.”  And I just don’t care. 🙂

surfing

I think my generation of women in midlife are breaking the mold of what middle aged women look like; of what they are “supposed to” act like. We are living our lives large. We are not giving much credence to what others think of us. We aren’t sitting around waiting for grandchildren. We are out taking life by the lapel and giving it a good shake. We are changing the image that comes to mind when you think, “middle aged woman.” We are taking the old stereotype and crushing it.

It is true we live in a society that worships youth. All you need to do is turn on the T.V., your computer, or pick up a magazine to see this. The media is full of tips and tricks on how women can look younger. Products to help us reverse the signs of aging.

One of the phrases I resent when it comes to women in midlife is, “how to age gracefully.”  You never hear this said about men as they age.

What if I don’t want to age gracefully?

What if I want to enter midlife coming in hot; frenzied, dauntless, and unflappable?

I don’t necessarily want to age tastefully, in a pleasing and delicate manner. I’d prefer to tackle age, and my life, with determination, chutzpah, and with fire.

Society sends us the message that aging is something to be feared, avoided, and even ashamed of.

 I feel quite the opposite. I am embracing my age and the freedom and fun that come with it. I feel like I’m a fine wine; only getting better with age.

I honestly don’t wish to be younger. I have never felt more comfortable in my own skin.

What I do wish is that all women could feel confident, embracing midlife and beyond, and recognize how beautiful and courageous they are, at any age.

Meet Karen

Karen at One Salty KissKaren has a master’s degree in counseling. She is a mom, surfer, writer, and personal development blogger. She is passionate about helping people leap out of their comfort zones and use their intrinsic gifts to live courageous, authentic lives. She leads classes and workshops and is active in encouraging women in all stages of life to nurture their passions and hold tight to their dreams. Karen is a featured contributor at BestKeptSelf.com and a contributing author to the book, “Legacy of Stoke –  A Collection of Stories That Made Us Surfers.”

 

Follow Karen

Website:     One Salty Kiss

Facebook:  Karen at One Salty Kiss

Twitter:      @OneSaltyKiss

Pinterest:   https://au.pinterest.com/kshatafian/

Instagram: Karen@One_Salty_Kiss

 Let’s Keep Sizzling!

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12 Comments

  • Reply Leanne July 10, 2016 at 20:23

    what a great attitude! I don’t mind the idea of ageing gracefully – but I also love the idea of giving it all you’ve got and hitting the ground running all the way! It’s lovely to read about another blogger finding midlife to be the best time of life 🙂

    • Reply Sue Loncaric July 13, 2016 at 08:26

      We are a growing trend I think Leanne – midlife bloggers unite 🙂

  • Reply Peggy July 10, 2016 at 21:07

    I love Karen! She’s super badass and I’m glad I’ve gotten to know her through blogging and social media!

    • Reply Sue Loncaric July 13, 2016 at 08:26

      Yes she is great Peggy. Another midlife woman showing how it is done! Thanks for stopping by.

  • Reply Kathleen - Bloggers Lifestyle July 10, 2016 at 21:49

    What an inspiring post, thank you, Karen and Sue. I think that as you say the stereotype mold is breaking out. Had to chuckle, my husband says that we are like a wine that gets better with age, Attitude is half the battle. You give us plenty of ideas and inspiration to enjoy it.

    • Reply Sue Loncaric July 13, 2016 at 08:28

      I’m pleased you enjoyed the post Kathleen. Karen has a great attitude to midlife and her enthusiasm is infectious.

  • Reply Rosemond July 11, 2016 at 10:50

    Love your courageous take on being over 40. It is so scary when your kids reach their teens and your role changes so much. Your confidence is so inspiring!

  • Reply Cathy Lawdanski July 11, 2016 at 21:19

    I love this and found Kaen early in my blogging “career”. You are right, Karen. You don’t ever see anything about men “aging gracefully” or “do’s and don’t’s for men over 40’s”. Our generation IS redefining aging and people like you are leading the way!

  • Reply Karen July 13, 2016 at 01:37

    Thank you all and thank you Sue for asking me to participate! I love that we are all giving midlife a run for it’s money!! xoxo

    • Reply Sue Loncaric July 13, 2016 at 08:33

      My pleasure Karen you are an inspiring lady and your enthusiasm for life is infectious. Have a great week!

  • Reply Wendy July 17, 2016 at 13:28

    Love the “not aging gracefully” part – I’ve always said that is something I refuse to do! 🙂 Karen, you have a great and inspiring attitude. Honestly, I joke about “getting older,” but I wouldn’t want to be a minute younger. Or to exchange a single experience. Whoever thought “midlife” could be so exciting?? 🙂

    • Reply Sue Loncaric July 18, 2016 at 12:41

      I feel encouraged by so many midlife women and their positive attitudes Wendy including you!

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