Health & Wellness Over 50s Lifestyle

2 questions to ask yourself when life overwhelms you

September 13, 2020
2 questions to ask yourself when life overwhelms you

Do you have times when you feel that there is just too much going on in your life?  I felt this way last Monday. I looked at my calendar and every day had several appointments or commitments and I just felt overwhelmed.  Also, during the week it was R U Okay? day.

Although we should check in with our mental and emotional health daily. Reach out and ask family or friends who might be struggling if they are okay when we see signs rather than just waiting for one day each year, R U Okay day does spotlight mental health and that is a good thing.

Checking in with myself I found I wasn’t doing brilliantly. Don’t get me wrong, I thrive on being busy as most of you will know from reading my blog. I love being involved in life BUT not if it is becoming a burden rather than enjoyment.

I’ve been working on the direction I want to take WLWA50, what I want to offer you all to Live Well plus other projects with some friends I’m in collaboration with.  I found myself looking at online courses, signing up for Wellness Summits which meant hours of video presentations – all valuable information but no time to sit, watch and appreciate the learnings. I have been running #30daysofhealthandwellness in the Facebook Group which included 3 inter-active interviews this week. I conducted an interview for my podcast and an interview where I was a guest on LiveFitNow! plus I instructed two classes in the Strong Healthy Women Virtual Studio. Phew!

I also feel I haven’t been spending as much quality time with my darling husband as I would like to.  Plus my 94 year old MIL has been in hospital and now back at her aged care home in quarantine for two weeks. We are concerned as she is very social and are maintaining daily phone contact to help her through this challenging time. More stress and anxiety to add to the mix of life.

What happened as a result of all this activity? 

My mind became so full of information, ideas and life in general that I couldn’t think straight.  I was anxious and stressed.

Just breathe

What did I do?

I reached out for help and took a deep breath. Although I’m a Life Coach and Health & Wellness Coach I still need to ask for advice and help at times. We don’t always take our own advice, so reaching out is important.

2 questions to ask yourself when life overwhelms you

I turned to my daughter who is an Executive Coach for advice. She asked me to consider two questions:

  1. What things are you doing that don’t directly align with your purpose?
  2. And if they all do, what isn’t energising you at the moment?

Two great questions which we can all ponder when life just becomes too much. 

After some thought I took action.

  • I prioritised what I needed to do and postponed or cancelled appointments that weren’t urgent
  • I reviewed my purpose and as per Rachel’s advice crossed off my list things that weren’t aligned with my purpose or that weren’t serving me well.
  • I took time out to spend time with my husband. I got lost in a book that was easy to read and was pure escapism.
  • I walked onto my balcony and looked at the ocean, taking some deep slow breaths
  • I assessed my core values and what works for me in life.

Have you been overcommitting yourself? Have you been overwhelmed? It’s time for some time out to re-align yourself with your core values and what is right for you at this moment in your life.

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18 Comments

  • Reply Donna Connolly September 13, 2020 at 12:36

    Hi, Sue – This is such an important post for us all to take to heart. We all find ourselves in situations where we are overwhelmed, have taken too much on, or are simply feeling ‘off’. The two questions that you have listed here are excellent, and your examples of strategies are spot-on. I’m glad that you took the break that you needed, and were able to reach out for help. You are always lifting others up so taking time for self-care is an essential fuel. Sending warm hugs your way.

    • Reply Sue Loncaric September 13, 2020 at 13:54

      Thank you my friend. I thought of you and how you take time for the things you enjoy and that inspired me. Rachel always gives me such good advice too. xx

  • Reply Toni Pike September 13, 2020 at 13:39

    Hi Sue, This article has some awesome advice – and I’m so pleased to hear you took some time out. I’m sorry to hear about your MIL – I do hope things improve soon. Toni x

    • Reply Sue Loncaric September 13, 2020 at 13:55

      Hi Toni, Luisa is back at her home but it was a concern at the time. x

  • Reply Leanne | www.crestingthehill.com.au September 13, 2020 at 17:07

    Finding that balance between being productive and being over-committed is such a tricky one isn’t it Sue? I think we all want to feel like we’re using our brains, bodies, souls, and emotions…….but when we keep taking on more and more things it can run away with us. I’m so glad you realized that was happening to you before you started to drown in it – and Rachel’s advice was right on point – nice having cluey people in the family isn’t it? Glad you’re back on track and have found your sweet spot again – and glad your MIL is doing well x

    • Reply Sue Loncaric September 18, 2020 at 13:23

      Rachel is so wise for her age – I know I wasn’t as wise at the same age that is for sure. It is important to be self-aware and recognise that we need to reach out sometimes for advice or help. x

  • Reply Debbie Harris September 14, 2020 at 08:09

    Thanks Sue for sharing your frame of mind so honestly. We often have these moments but try to cover them up from ourselves mainly and that just compounds the feeling of overwhelm. I loves Rachels’ advice to you and even more that you took it on board. You are such an inspiration. Finding that balance is tricky as Leanne says but we are all here for you at anytime :). xx

    • Reply Sue Loncaric September 18, 2020 at 13:27

      Hi Deb, I tend to hold back at times but know that when I ask for support I’m surrounded by many who want to help. Rachel is very wise. xx

  • Reply Natalie September 14, 2020 at 08:35

    Hi Sue, I’m so glad you recognized the symptoms and reached out for help. Rachel’s advice is excellent and your actions are right on. Be well and have a wonderful week! #lifethisweek

    • Reply Sue Loncaric September 18, 2020 at 13:28

      Thank you Natalie for your good wishes. I’m lucky to have my own private coach in Rachel – she is a pretty special daughter. xx

  • Reply Lydia C. Lee September 14, 2020 at 08:45

    I think COVID has eroded our coping mechanisms, and to some extent our functioning. I am taking much longer to get everything done and never getting thru my list. It’s my focus. I’m working on not worrying about my ever shifting shedule and just being happy with what is getting down. I’m also taking a mental health day once a week – clocking off the Biennale of Sydney with friends or by myself. It’s helping me feel better about this weird existence we are in. Take care.

  • Reply Erica/Erika September 14, 2020 at 11:10

    Hi Sue, I did read more about the R U Okay day after our last conversation. A great concept for every day. I always greatly admire you for how self aware you are, Sue.

    I was recently reading a blog about leaving more negative space within a photo. The focal point is more effective and beautiful. This made me think about how important the negative space is in my life. It is also something I need to work on.

    You bring up 2 excellent points. Both help align my energy. I appreciate how you share your journey with us. An excellent, relevant post! xx

  • Reply Joanne Tracey September 14, 2020 at 15:05

    Yes yes and yes. I can easily say that very little that I do at the moment is aligning with my purpose. What am I going to do about it? I’m not sure just yet…

  • Reply Judith Pratt-Jefferies September 14, 2020 at 23:37

    Sue I can SO relate. On my planning page for each day there is a prompt “What is your biggest challenge?” My response is always the same “over expecting of myself”. For a long time I also wrote, as a solution,” Be aware and change course” Recently i decided it was time to get tough with me, and I now write DON’T and it works much better. Fewer things are put in my TO DO list and Yes, .if they do not align with my higher purpose I move them to the IF I WANT TO list (this helps me feel I have a choice) Thanks for sharing.

  • Reply Denyse Whelan September 16, 2020 at 15:54

    This was great advice and the best part for me was that YOU knew what was happening but, for that time, just were not sure how to prioritise and get back on an even footing. My husband is a great help to me when I got that feeling in late Feb this year, he got me to envision things as a wave, a gentle one, I could hop over then one at a time rather than a tsunami as it had started to feel like. Thank you for joining the link up for #lifethisweek. Next week, the optional prompt is 38/51 Grateful For This. 21.9.2020 I hope that you link up again too. Take care, Denyse.

    • Reply Sue Loncaric September 18, 2020 at 13:32

      Hi Denyse, I usually can recognise when I’m feeling this way but try to push through which isn’t always the best way to handle life. Reaching out when we need help is the best way because we can get the support we need. x

  • Reply Sue-Anne at SisterStay October 6, 2020 at 03:51

    I love these two questions. Occasionally, I am so overwhelmed by everything I have committed to that I just cancel it ALL and curl up in bed for a day!! I think the two questions a little sooner than that might be a better strategy. How lovely to have a daughter who is also so life-savvy.

    • Reply Sue Loncaric October 8, 2020 at 08:23

      I think having a PJ’s day is great, Sue-Anne. Sometimes we just need to nurture ourselves and forget about the world for a while. I do have a very wise and supportive daughter who helps me for which I am grateful x

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